So, its been awile since i last narrated a blog. Actually let me explain why i am narrating this blog entry. The answer being boredom on Chantelle’s part, lazyness on Tariq’s part and finally intrigument on Zahid’s part. So lets start with the talk of the town. Saeed’s birthday bonanza aka The Greatest Birthday Ever! Some of the things which happened that night are never to be spoken of again by those involved. So unfortunatly i cant share as much as i would like, but it was a truly memorable and bonding experience (thanks Zahid for that word.) And then even after Saeed had left and the bonanza had finished, the fun carried on till the early hours with the legendary team game of who could think of the most ‘ate’ words (pause for we had to explain the game for Zahid) It was one of my most memorable nights in manchester to date. P.S the presents were too much. P.P.S the food at zouk’s was amazing, the steak was too nice, in fact thats the little picture im going to put up on the side Now on to the next bonanza…

ZAHIDS BIRTHDAY BO-NAN-ZA! Started off with a mass battle between Chantelle and Zaf, along the lines of  ‘Why dont you drink?’ A vicious assault from Zaf which resulted in me, Mohsin and Riz having to stick up for Chantelle and ask the same question to Zaf, why doesnt he drink?! Also, unfortunatly some of the Saeed birthday bonanza shenanigans were brought into Zahids birthday bonanza and the results werent pleasant for all involved (im being intentionally vague for my readers, i wish to protect you from this VILE… thing!) Then we went to Akbars aka Rudebars but their service was shocking, there was no take your time, no feel free to stick around, it was sit down, order, eat, do one! That lack of time in ordering led me and Talli to rush and pick a dish which was not right for us and our needs of what we wanted to eat. At this point i was dreaming of being back in time 24 hours to the real birthday bonanza (just kidding for Zahid, i really enjoyed the rude waiters) Then we went to Shisha and that was wicked. Me, Riz and H did karaoke without a karaoke machine. The whole shisha cafe looked at us disgustedly as we were ruining their shisha music experience. We replied by singing louder “We gotta fight fight fight fight fight for this love!!!!”  Then it turned 12 oclock and we gave Zahid birthday wishes and majority of us unfortunatly had to disperse as some had to go home and others had pressing matters. FYI on that thursday i got my first last year assignment mark back and me and Mohsin and Talha and Giorgio and Mattia got 75%. Very proud to say the least, ecstatic to say the most, anything in between is a medium answer.

Now on to this week at Manchester (Barlick was standard) Monday morning started with the new Zahid, waking up before 9am, 8.22 to be precise. Going for breakfast and then going into uni for before 10am and then staying in university until 5.30pm (pause for shock to wear off) The guy kicked it. Shame he didnt do any work. Then me, H, Muddy, Zahid and Mohsin embarked on one of the greatest walks home i have ever experienced. Again, i shall protect my readers from some of the obscenities that were used but a comment i made about Zahid had H in such laughter i thought he was gonna die. Then we chilled at night and i felt it was up to me to now try and get the second slacker to go to university. So i set my eyes firmly on Chantelle and i knew there was one thing that motivated her… Food! (only joking) I offered Chantelle a meal to come in to university at 9oclock and low and behold at 9oclock like clockwork she was ringing the bell and getting herself in and ready to go to university with Ibrar. Then at uni i went into the library and low and behold she was in the library doing work! The shock on my face was priceless! So after watching liverpool getting knocked out of the Champions league (hahahahahah) me and Chantelle went to Nandos and had a tremendous meal and nice and revealing talk. Then we went back to the house and heard all about TNF (Tuesday night football) Zahid says (“not I say its a fact, i played awesomly, this is aside from the quotations i scored 3 goals in 3 minutes or was it 2 minutes, no just put 3 minutes”) In my opinion its just a cheap friday night football althought there are disagreements in Manchester and Mohsin did soil the name, the good name, of friday night football ratings with his shoddy, disgraceful twitter post! Today i chilled with aneesa and chantelle and ibrar and told the truth… It was a very good laugh we had me and ibrar are too much at telling the truth…

So whats upcoming in the life of  Tariq? Thats the question Chantelle just asked me (Chantelle says thats a lie, but i lie on my website my readers should know that) I replied enthusiastically, Eid on friday, going home early on thursday. i have no Eid clothes thought, dissapointed. Then back to work on saturday and sunday have a big few weeks now til christman holidays, need to do alot of work. Hopefully i should get good grades. Now, we are hoping Zahid gets motivated and hands in a brilliant assignment, hoping being the key word.

(Narrated by Tariq Ahmed)

(Written by Chantelle Khaliq)